Parenting decisions

Parenting is hard. And, it's so hard to know if you are making the right decisions. Even if you make one decision with one kid, you will have to re-make it again with the next. The things that apply to one kid do not necessarily apply to the other. In my case, that is sooooo much the case. I have two very different kiddos-- think I have mentioned that here before... ;)

Thomas is at the stage where more is being expected of him at school... and while he is a super good kid and is very responsible for his age, he has had some trouble with some increased expectations of him at school. This kid has the memory of an elephant-- seriously! He remembers now-- at age 7-- being in diapers. No kidding! But, lately, he has struggled a little with making sure he has all his homework, library book, etc. and I know that has a lot to do with the fact that he is used to being reminded. That has a lot to do with me and knowing how to let go enough to allow him to "mess up" and learn from the consequences. Boy, that is hard! Last week, for the 2nd time in as many weeks, he forgot his homework folder at school. The first time, I was able to call Andrew and Daddy saved the day, bringing it home after work. Last week though, by the time he realized he didn't have his spelling homework, we made him deal with it-- I HATED doing that! I mean I really hated it! But, it was later in the day (so we most likely would not have been able to get back into the school) and Andrew and I both felt like he needed to learn what the consequences of that were... He needs to know that we will not always be able to "save the day" for him. That has been a heartbreaking realization for me. He is growing up and I cannot always "fix" stuff for him. So, we talked about it all and after a few tears (again, heartbreaking!) he came to the realization that he might be able to do some of it the next morning at school... and if not, it was not the end of the world. In the end, he couldn't find it, his card got turned (the consequence) and it was okay. Now, every day since, he has double-checked-- being more responsible about it-- and he has also learned that it is not going to kill him to mess up... a lesson this perfectionist-Mommy definitely sees the value in! :)

So... Tyler...

While technically, he will be "old enough" to go to Kindergarten in the Fall, he is just not ready... not so much "academically", but in maturity and socially. I have thought long and hard about this, and the first experience in school shapes the rest... if he is not ready now and we send him, school will never be a good experience for him... he will have trouble trying to succeed at something he is just not ready for... and I want him to enjoy school. Because his birthday is early, he will be much better off to start Kindergarten as a young 6 year old than a young 5 year old.

BUT... he *really* needs to have a preschool experience this fall... While we have and will continue to work on concepts, I really see him needing that group experience before Kindergarten. I've been looking into different programs-- and as a former public school preschool teacher, I feel like I should have more resources to find the right program, but I am having trouble finding something where the time, cost and travel will work for us. I started attending MOPS recently though, so I sent an email asking for suggestions... REALLY hoping to find something that will work. He just really needs it.

So... all of that up there just to say that it is hard being a parent-- lol... you love them, pray, make decisions and pray some more that they are the right ones. That's all you can really do... it's hard, really hard... but that's what prayer and faith is for. :)

L