just did this... this is who I am, apparently...
until the last day of school. :) Today, we had field day, and I bypassed the sunscreen since I am in need of vitamin D (a deficiency)... all day, no noticeable sun at all... other people were noticeably brown or burned... me, nothing. Then, after we came in and were in for about 3 hours, my arms began to turn-- they're red now, but not anywhere else. Very strange. Wonder if that is how a vitamin D deficiency works? It's always taken sun a long time to show up on me, but not usually tis long. Don't know? Don't know if I posted before, but apparently, I have a Vitamin D level of 10, which is supposed to be between 30-100. Don't really know much more about it though at this point.
This afternoon, I received my contract for next year... until I get through these tests with the neuro and rheumatologist, I don't know what to do...
Anyway, summer is coming and I need it... God will reveal the rest to me; I know He will. Keeping faith in that fact is the key.
Lynn
just quiet... some things on my mind and some things I am just tired of thinking about and don't want to put into words yet. Home for holiday and only have a few more days of school left, so life will get quieter soon. Hope everyone out there is well.
L
I know I just posted a "one of those days" kind of post, but seriously, people have just shocked me all day long today! Things that they think are right-- and I am so not saying I am always right-- but it's been one of those days where I have thought "what the heck is wrong with you?" about 800 times. Just super selfish things, and inconsiderate things, things that you just cannot believe people justify... just kills me.
So in recognition of that thought... and the fact that Andrew just bought me this CD last week... (pretty sure I've posted this song before)...
We got all the stuff for Mother's Day made at school-- and darn it, I didn't get any pics to post... was too busy trying to get them made in time. We did "in their own words" cookbooks-- sooooo cute! And we made flower pots with flower pens (you know with the silk flowers and floral tape). The kids decorated their flower pots-- they really turned out cute, but alas no pics. Hoping for a nice Mother's Day this year myself. :) It was teacher appreciation week, so I am happily adorned with roses and flower bouquets, lotion, a tote bag and lots of candy-- most of which I can't eat (sugar), but it's okay; I like to share. Now if I could just stop twitching and hurting, and get my memory to work again, I'd be set. Tyler had to open his own inhaler this morning--- I couldn't get it open... and I bought toothpaste yesterday because I totally forgot Andrew bought some the day before. Don't think you can ever really have too much though anyway, LOL.
Off to the weekend... Happy Mom's Day!
L
Do you ever have one of those days where everything you have put on hold or not allowed yourself to think about or haven't had TIME to think about seems to come crashing down around you? You know, when you;ve been going through life status quo and all of a sudden you have a day where it feels like you are suddenly forced to deal with EVERYTHING all at once? Today felt that way to me. It's been an emotional week at work this week, still in the middle of medical quandaries, and yes, to exasperate things, I am also hormonal. We're already dealing with things for next year at work, and there are a lot of changes, problems, etc. ahead, so just some stressful stuff to think about there. I've been drifting around since last week (since starting the neurontin back) and so I asked yesterday when I called for my results if I could go back to the whole dose at night again, and I have the go ahead, so I went all day today without it. Much more awake, but more twitching, tingling, etc. And, when I got to school this morning, I hit my head first thing-- and hard-- jarred my teeth, LOL. Just such a Monday kind of day.
Then, Thomas gives me his progress report (I have to finish mine tonight to go home tomorrow, on top of Mother's Day gifts I have to finish up on for school), and he has a "D"-- yes, a "D" in MATH-- what?!?!?! I know, this is just a progress reoprt, but they JUST started sending home actual grades and I am floored by this-- the kid is so good in math! And, no explanation other than the list of grades-- so I'm trying not to react in front of him, but I am seriously floored. Then we get to his homework and he is now working on fractions-- less than / greater than... okay, but they don't have the same denominator, he doesn't know what that term means and they aren't doing division yet... huh? How is he supposed to understand what he is doing? SO, I didn't get my stuff pulled together for school tomorrow, just trying to help him understand it... another teacher came over and tried to help out, the other K teacher and I had a long talk and by the time I got out of there, it was 5:00-- my stuff for tomorrow is not ready, my mother's day recipes aren't typed and my progress reports aren't done. Not a good ending to a not good day. That's how all of life hit me all at once.
We are too busy to see how things aren't working most days and then it all just falls right on your head. We need to reconfigure how homework is done and checked, Thomas needs more help-- more attention. I can't get stuff done, so I bring it home, the house is a mess, Thomas needs help with homework, we eat out too much, the laundry needs to be folded, the dog walked, lunches to make for tomorrow, progress reports, cookbooks to type, and here I sit. I just had to get it all off my chest... but there has GOT to be a better system... sigh...
L
Been too busy with stuff... Thomas and Tyler went to scouts at a local living arts museum and they had a reptile night last night. Andrew took these with his phone, so not great quality, but at least we got them. I didn't go... and no offense Andrew about the pics-- it's not the "taker", just the tool. :)
I have another of Tyler with the snake, but it's on my phone. I wasn't at all surprised that Ty touched the snake, but I was surprised that Thomas did-- my kiddos are night and day.
Look at his face, he looks like he's counting the seconds until the snake is gone, LOL.
LOVE this turtle... well, I guess it's really a "tortoise".
As for me... I got my stuff to fill out in the mail today from the new rheumatologist... pretty intensive paperwork there... and I'm not supposed to fill it out until one week before I visit in June. I haven't gotten any results from the neurologist yet-- figured I wouldn't yet. I started the neurontin back yesterday and it's going to be a hard adjustment to taking it during the day. I took all of it at night last time I took it-- now it's spread out through the day. It's kicking my butt right now... I hope it gets better. It seems to be helping the tingling, but not even touching the twitches at all yet. I twitched all last night, had cramps in my feet and have twitched all day. It's like having an alien or something crawling under your skin-- you can actually SEE it... my hands, my arms, my feet, my eyes, etc. My foot was going crazy last night-- my toe kept moving involuntarily. BIG movements, too. It's worse at the end of the day when I TRY to relax. It's driving me crazy.
I've been thinking about the "no resolution" comment by this dr. I think (aka "hope") he was just saying that if I think there is one thing I can "do" to make it all stop without taking meds, then that's not going to happen... I have decided that if it makes it stop, I can deal with meds. And in retrospect, he made this statement shortly after I said that I didn't like taking the neurontin. SO, I am thinking he simply meant that there was no one thing I am going to be able to do just once and be done with it. What I WANT is to find the root cause-- to have an answer to the "what" this is, and then I want to DO what I need to do just to feel normal again. He did say after that "no resolution" comment that he thinks that it's still the right thing to do to find the root cause. That comment was a bit odd, too-- I kind of thought, "well, yeah, you think I'm just going to feel this way and go about life as usual, not wondering why it's happening?" But I realize he said things a little differently just because he is not from here, so I need to give him the benefit of the doubt, I guess. So, I guess I've calmed down a bit, but still just REALLY need and want to figure out what is causing this and move on. If it's Vitamin D, tell me, I'll take some... if it's some nerological disorder, tell me-- if it's autoimmune tell me... and then tell me what to DO and NOT DO, you know...
So, anyway, off to the weekend... going to take a little rest now... hopefully, I'll be able to get back to photog soon, I miss it. :(
L
